foxwrapped (foxwrapped) wrote in imperiousleader,

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Your new Imperious Leader is DEAD.
I killed the motherfucker.

I am the old Imperious Leader and I am back.


Here are some guidelines to help you hail:

1. None of you better cut in front of me while I drive. I will call you a motherfucker. My Officer of Public Relations will giggle at your silliness.
2. Homosexuality is to be respected, dammit. If I ever hear calling something (like a shirt or car) gay I'm going to kill you.
3. You will make me shrimp.
4. All of you motherfuckers out there who think rice isn't sticky are motherfuckers. You motherfuckers keep on asking us asian motherfuckers how we eat rice with "them sticks" and that it would take forever. You motherfuckers are stupid. Rice is supposed to be WHITE and STICKY so you can mix it up with sauce and meat pick it up in clumps. What do you know anyway? You only know rice from Del Taco.
5. You will like my disco version of popular songs. My version of Trouble by Coldplay mixed with a Bossa Nova beat will be my first hit.
6. I know you all think that the fish bait you see is stores looks harmless and pretty tasty, but it harbors dangerous chemicals. It can give you cancer. I put one of those things in a plastic container and it melted through. It is a sight to behold. My god. i can't believe I actually put those worms in my mouth and took a picture.

That's all for now. Wait. My regime needs more members. I need minions. I have positions availible. I am taking resumes and applications.
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